Did you ever meet a father who was also a woman?
As well as a songwriter, a singer, a comedienne and a teacher?
Let me introduce you to Merel Moistra!
A beautifull female stage name, but her birth announcement happily informs the world: ‘It’s a boy!'
Not understanding what was ‘wrong’ with her, Merel tried to live in peace with the way her body had been constructed. But to no avail. Slowly - very slowly - it began to dawn on her why she couldn’t continue living with it as it was.
Eventually, she made the decision to reverse the genetic mistake of her male body. Already, hormone treatment is feminizing her body and in a year or so an operation will take the final step of transforming her male genitals into those of a female.
But – just to complicate matters ever so slightly - when Merel was still going through life as a man, she had already met Bianca, the love of her life, who also became the mother of her children.
Nevertheless, Bianca is a very supportive wife and, as such, she does not think that her male partner’s decision to become a woman is any reason to break up their loving family. Their relationship is simply undergoing a smooth transition from a male-female relation to a female-female relation. Wasn’t it Plato who once said that the love between two members of the same sex would always be a deeper love than that of one sex for the other? These two lucky people succeeded in finding each other and for the past 15 years have been growing and developing together. Their relationship is now deepening even further. “Something really dramatic must happen to break up this union,” says Bianca, but she doesn’t see Merel’s transformation that way. “People make a drama of it, but it isn’t so!”
Bianca is a part-time teacher in an elementary school and together, both she and Merel have successfully built a business together that sells a course they have developed in website-building and also a CD with educational children-songs. See http://www.educatieteam.nl http://www.leukeleerzameliedjes.nl http://www.merelmoistra.nl
'Are you performing today?' After she was told that her father wanted to become a girl, she seemed to be aware of his discomfort and consoled him by saying: 'So we can be girlfriends!’
Their second child, Thomas, is now three years old. He never saw his father dressed as a man, but still he knows that his daddy is “different.” Most of the time Thomas calls his father ‘pappa’ at times ‘mamma’, and more often, ‘pamma,’ but when Merel puts curlers in her hair for a Twenties’ party he is inconsolable because he wants his dad to look like a normal woman again!
Experts say that Merel is an outstanding songwriter and performer. She loves music, has a deep-rooted understanding of the compositional form and seems to be blessed with a bottomless well of creativity. Songs are a way of expressing herself for her own personal amusement but also for the joy of many others as well.
She doesn't need to look very far for the subjects of her songs: she sings honestly, openly and with lots of humor about her own life.
This documentary will feature Merel's songs and what she sings about: her family, her life now, in the past and in the future. Singing at home and on stage, Merel will take us on an emotional, intriguing, funny, but also quite a deep journey into her world, as she transforms herself from a man into woman.
The documentary will be broken down into chapters, accentuated by samples of Merel’s excellent song-writing skills.
Check out songs like 'Red Light District Blues':
and 'Mr Empty Head':
But in this Blogumentary, each song will deal with another aspect of Merel’s life and each song will lead us into another sequence about a new aspect of Merel’s life: Childhood, Parents, Identity and Sexual Identity, Love, Family, Children, the Process of Changing from Man to Woman, the Role of Laughter, etc. etc. As Merel will sing about her process of change, her songs will take us to ‘behind the scenes’ of the transgender world: we’ll meet various practitioners, such as Thomas Wormgoor from Transgender Team Nederland; the policewoman Marja Lust from Roze in Blauw; and Dr. Krege, who will operate Merel in Krefeld, Germany. We will also see Merel’s performances, among other places, in the bi-annually Transvision Festival.
Is it true that Merel’s and Bianca’s children absorb this process as the most natural process on earth? What’re the odds that they’ll still see it as ‘natural’ when their friends start pointing fingers at them? Will their friends ever do so? Will the kids find new solutions to new problems?
Will Merel, or her family, regret it all, after it’s too late? Or will it simply work?
To answer these questions we’ll follow Merel and her family as the process progresses. We’ll witness the medical transformation; we’ll talk to the doctors who treat Merel, as well as with the psychiatrists who talk to her and her family. We’ll talk to Merel’s and Bianca’s family, colleagues at work, and the children’s teachers. We’ll meet the neighbors, Merel’s students, and Merel’s colleagues on stage, where she performs.
* * *
The style of the documentary is light-hearted. Though we deal with crucial issues of health – physical, mental and emotional - (and for some, crucial issues of morality, as well!), we start from the point of view of Merel and her family: it’s normal, it’ll be alright, we can laugh about it already now!
But we also will raise the kind of doubts that we imagine will probably trouble some of those who will be seeing the documentary: Is it true? Can it be true? What’s the price a person would be willing to pay, to be happy? (How much suffering will one endure in order to be happy?)
Merel is who she says she is, a woman . . . with issues. It took some time for her to realize this, but now she thinks she has found her place. She’s the author of her own Identity. Her conviction is so strong that it helps her stand up to all the conventions and prejudices that she feels are working against her.
Merel will answer that tans-sexuality is a natural progression and this phenomena cannot be denied.
"And I know it. I tried it long enough. If there is a God, He made me the way that I am. Thank God!”
What is an Identity? Can the midwife decide who we are? Are we the result of some twist of fate? Who should decide who we are? Do we decide it ourselves? Is our Identity a label that other people put on us, or is an Identity an urge that we feel ourselves, one that fights for recognition, against all labels, against all odds?
